Top Two

I was at a school today and I saw a year four kid come up to his chaplain and say "Excuse me, what do you think God's top two favourite things to do are? I'll tell you what I think; I think it's loving people and inventing stuff."

I'm pretty inclinded to agree. Quite the theologian that kid.

Hashtag: QandA

Prime Minister Gillard was on Q and A tonight, and it was a ripper of a show. Gillard was on fire. She did a really impressive performance. Political skills wise, it was kinda like watching John Howard at work, she was that good, plus, unlike with Howard, I didn't feel dirty afterwards.

I'm still not sure I'm a Gillard fan, but I think I have more respect for her. And I agreed with her on most stuff. I enjoyed her pragmatism and willingness to answer questions. I didn't ever really feel like she avoided the questions, even the tough ones. She didn't always seem like she was giving the most genuine answer, when have you ever felt that with pollie?

Even if you don't like Gillard, you can be impressed by some quality question handling, just like I'm impressed by Howard's skills. If you haven't seen the show, go watch it on iview. It was a cracker.

Just so you know, the image isn't from this Qanda, it's from last year, but tonight's one isn't around the web yet.

SF BAY AREA TEEN LEAPS FROM GG BRIDGE AS PRANK, LIVES

Every generation of high school students, it seems, has one knuckleheaded classmate whose judgment is so seriously impaired that their antics are destined for urban legend, and this generation is apparently no exception.

A Windsor (Sonoma County) high school took a number of students on a fieldtrip to the Golden Gate Bridge when a 17 year old junior leapt from the bridge in front of his horrified classmates after bragging about his bridge jumping prowess, then lived to tell the tale after a 55 year old surfer pulled the teen out of the water with a stern lecture, the San Francisco Chronicle reports.

A Windsor Unified School District press release said the teen suffered no severe injuries beyond bruising and tenderness. Hospital officials said they cannot release specific information

Seven people have died in GG Bridge leaps this year, Golden Gate Bridge District officials estimated for the Chronicle. Last year, the count was 32.

"He did it to try to look cool," said one classmate, who did not want to be identified. "He said he'd jumped off bridges before." Another student who said he was on the scene tweeted that students tried to stop the boy before he leaped.

Read more: Windsor teen survives Golden Gate Bridge jump (SF Chronicle)

Biggie Smalls feat Lil' Kim - Another

"What do you do if your Bi**ch is untrue, do you cut that hooker off and find someone new...I need another Bi**h, another Bi**h in my life"......"What do you do when you man is untrue, do you cut that sucker off and find someone new..I need another man.....in my liiifffeeee" Memba when you said you would die for me...syht......

Another classic from the "Life After Death" CD by Biggie and Lil Kim called "Another!" This track alone shares the secrets behind the love affair they have been rumored to have. Listening to this track then watching the movies shows alot. I mean Lil Kim fealt they potrayed her wrong, but from her songs and this one I think they did a great job. Plus instead of having all that hate on her chest, she should have put it aside and told her story.

Bt off that BIGGIE was the best and I will Love him as my favorite rapper FOREVER!!

You Gotta Fight! For Your Right!

So here's a question we were pondering tonight, what happens with hens and bucks nights in gay marriage? I know everyone is debating about gay marriage at the moment but this is an issue that nobody is talking about.

Say two gay men decide to get married. Is Groom One allowed to go to the bucks' night of Groom Two? Or do they stay away? And are their male friends obligated to go to two separate bucks nights? Or do they just have to choose the groom they like the most?

Also, what about the men's female friends? What party do they go to? They don't have a party to go to. The men get two parties and the girls get zero. I know people feel that not allowing gay marriage is discriminatory, but allowing gay marriage is potentially discriminatory for all those who will be left out of bucks and hens nights everywhere. It's a catch-22 really. Someone's gonna have their rights impinged, the question is just who?

International Women's Day Announcement

Dear Women,

If I was a CEO I'd give you equal pay (or 90% at the very least) because I care.

Just make sure you don't go and get pregnant.

Love,

Tom

Family Upgrade

My sister Jo had her baby. We're all very relieved because a few of us were worried that there was no baby and she just made up the baby to cover-up her love of Pollo Campero's deep fried chicken. But it turns our her fatness was not all chicken, some of it was child.

Or in fact, it was all chicken and they've just stuck photos of a baby on Facebook while she goes to Pollo Campero rehab.

But I'm gonna trust that while my family is sometimes devious about things like this, they're not skilled enough to execute a conspiracy of such massive proportions without my help. So I believe there is a baby and his name is Sebastian. And this is the alleged nephew:



Photo credit: Chochy Morales (my sister in-law once removed or something)

He's very cute.

I picked up Hannah, my younger sister, from after school care today, and I was talking to her about how she's an auntie and I'm an uncle, and I couldn't quite get my head around that. I feel the weight of responsibility now to do the barbecue at Christmas and forget birthdays, uncles have a hard job.

If you notice Sebastian is looking more white than brown. Seeing as his father is a good looking Latino we were hoping for a lady killer mixed-race kid. Mixed race people are almost always hot (unless you do something dangerous like mix an Irish with a Kiwi). They tell me the baby will get darker soon. I hope so. I only allow hot people in my family. Lucky he's a baby, because babies are always cute. He has until he's three to become good looking or I'm voting him out of the family.

Anyway congratulations to Jo for having a baby and not just some chicken. Congratulations to Sebastian for being born, beautiful and a symbol of Australia and Guatemala's friendship and close military alliance. Congratulations to Victor for becoming a Dad and sitting on a couch and eating sandwiches during the labour.


Just so you know, I am actually very thankful to God for Sebastian. I don't care how un-Latino he looks... well I don't care much. And I'm very proud of my sister for having a baby. I wouldn't do it even if I could. I'm really looking forward to meeting him, and forgetting his birthday regularly. Well done, Jo, Victor and Sebastian. Praise God for all his many blessings including children and Pollo Campero!