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Friday, July 31, 2009

Facebook Policy

You're probably all wondering what I did with Facebook.

I didn't delete it. I really wanted to but decided it's probably too useful for ministry.

But for the moment, while I still feel the need to use Facebook to show everyone how wonderful I am this is what I've decided to do:

- Stop updating my status
- Stop commenting on other people's statuses
- Comment on photos only if I think they're really worth commenting on
- Reply to inbox messages and wall posts
- Stop tagging photos or uploading photos
- Check Facebook less
- Send more emails

I'm not sure I'm going to stick to this forever. Probably just till I stop feeling the need to check Facebook all the time. I got sick of it wasting my time, having to read everyone's status updates (most of which are useless) and most of all I got sick of worrying about projecting the proper image of myself to everyone on Facebook. So now I will attempt to project very little image at all.

"Vanity, vanity, everything is vanity."

I will probably keep looking at photos of myself though. I do like to be reminded how good looking and fun loving I am.

One for the Ladies

Disclaimer: Hungry Leafs Fan is not responsible for any pregnancies during the reading of this post

I'm heading to a wedding this weekend. It will be the first of my high school friends to get married. This got me wondering..."Who would make the perfect pro athlete wife?" I came up empty. I simply couldn't think of any good looking female athletes. I mean there's a couple of decent ones.
Sharapova is kind of cute, there's the pole vaulter, Allison Stokke but I didn't want to go there since she may be underage and Jenny Finch is okay if you like the porn star look. There just doesn't seem to be any bombshells in female atheletics. They mostly look like the Williams sisters, Chyna or Hayley Wickenheiser. *Shudders*

The female sports fan has it good. Though there are enough
ugly male athletes the number of good looking ones balances it out. Where is the female equivalent to David Beckham, The Vesa or Luke Schenn? So instead of looking for the perfect pro athlete wife, I took to my friends and family to find the perfect pro athlete husband.

Shirley: Jason Kapono because he's a stud and he's not too big (that's what she said) compared to other basketball players. He also doesn't play a contact game so I wouldn't have to worry too much on game days.


Okay Shirley, you do know that Kapono is 6'8, right? She also said "orrrr maybe Shaq because he's funny" right after naming Kapono so I don't know what she wants!

No, seriously. I don't model underwear, I play basketball.

Check out my sweet stroke

That's great Jason, now let's see your O-face.

Lisa: Jarome Iginla because he's a great guy and a great hockey player. He scores yet he's not afraid to get his hands dirty.

Iginla is great. He's charitable, great with his fans, a true class act. Only true douchebags like Canucks fans can legitimately hate this guy. Heck, I might even have picked him is he didn't look like a beluga.

He disposes Canucks for a living. How can you hate him?

Suit up!

Leave the helmet on, Jarome. It covers your belugaish forehead.

How's my O-Face? More Oh and less Ah next time

Aileen: Sidney Crosby! He's from Nova Scotia and people there are nice. He's also very poised for somebody his age.

Yes, Aileen. But he also looks like a weasel. If you ever do nab him, make him promise you he will never attempt a playoff beard again.

If a female becomes the next commissioner, I have a feeling hockey will be played shirtless

I may or may not sleep with a night light

High school graduation?

How's my O-Face? Act like you've been there before, rookie. Oh, you haven't?...

Jackie: Anthony Parker. He's good looking and humble. He can also hit clutch buckets.

Hmm...I'm not sure if I want a guy who will always be overshadowed by his younger sister. And he moved to Cleveland for god's sake.

Fuck off, Kapono. Me! I'm the best looking Raptor.

The feud between Parker and Kapono for best looking Raptor ended in a tragedy as their half time walk-offs became a distraction and they both got the boot.

How's my O-Face? The best yet.

Al: That's easy, Tom Brady! He's got it all. He's good looking, he's the best QB in the NFL and what more can you ask for, really?

Brady may be taken but he is definitely the McDreamy of the NFL. Watch out Gisele...
It's like he's staring right into my soul

Pythons!!!1

Yes, we're going to be making some good looking babies.

How's my O-Face? FIERCE!

Kurt: Vince Carter because he takes care of business.

Right, if crumbling on the floor and quitting on your team is business then he definitely does take care of it. Just don't sign the pre-nup, Kurt.

He sure knows how to handle balls between his legs

I hope you like him in a suit because it's a sight you're going to have to get used to

How's my O-Fa...MUSCLE CRAMP, MUSCLE CRAMP!

Christine: Georges St-Pierre! He's so cute, his French accent is adorable and I love his perfectly chiseled body.

Richard: GSP. He's so dominant in his sport, he's ripped and classy.

Okay, GSP is a great answer. He is the definition of a beefcake. I just have a problem with his partying ways. Plus he likes the Habs and the Oilers.

No Georges, I won't be able to 'andle da riddum.

I hope you like it on the bottom because GSP loves being on top

How can you reject a well dressed man?

The O-Face is a bit goofy and can use some work but other than that, he's totally sponge-worthy

Now as you can see, I had a plethora of studs to choose from and that doesn't even include names like Cristiano Ronaldo or Jesse Palmer. However, I chose to take a different route. My pro-athlete man-crush is Roger Federer.

Now Federer isn't ugly but I wouldn't say he's a bonafide stud either. He seems like a great guy. He's humble, classy, he dominates his game (that's right, Nadal can suck it), he's loaded (hey, I need the financial security!) and average seems to be his cup of tea.

Yes! Being your man-crush is probably a greater accomplishment than my grand slams.

The unbuttoned top button let's me know he ain't all business.

Mr. Federer & Mrs. Average

How's my O-Face? Intense!

With millions of pro athletes yet to be mentioned, I'm sure I left your main man off my list. Are you a chubby chaser? Maybe you like the scruffy look? (hey, I'm not here to judge) So let's hear it. Who's your pro athlete hubby/man-crush?

Thursday, July 30, 2009

Love Hurts

Love hurts
But sometimes it's a good hurt
And it feels like I'm alive

Love sings
When it transcends the bad things
Have a heart and try me
'Cause without love I won't survive

Incubus - Love Hurts

So I'm heading to a concert tonight (Incubus and not Coldplay, thankfully) and as always, I would listen to their albums to get hyped up for it. This morning I was listening to their greatest hits/rarities & b-sides album, Monuments & Melodies and the song Love Hurts came on. As the chorus started to play, I thought of our favourite Czech.

I can only imagine what Tomas must be thinking. For 10 seasons, this man has poured his blood, sweat and tears into this great organization and what does he get in return? Fans demanding he be traded for some young, unproven talent. I have a friend who told me Kaberle was dead to him because we could have gotten Jeff Carter for him. I don't know about you but I clearly remembered when those rumours broke out and I hated the trade. Carter was an unproven talent who showed no signs of being the 40+ goal scorer that he would later become. It's easy to make a trade in hindsight. If we all made deals in hindsight, Stojanov would have never left the Canucks, Gilmour would have never came to the Leafs and we would have never had to see Raycroft don the blue and white (okay scratch that one, that was a horrible trade at the time too).

It's okay to be hurting, Tomas because like the song says, love hurts but sometimes it's a good hurt because it let's you feel alive. I just wanted you to know that we still love you and even if it feels like the whole city of Toronto is against you, you will always have myself, eyebleaf, the general and many others in the Barilkosphere in your corner. We will fuck up Cam Janssen if you need us to, just give us the sign.

We're going to need you to lead this young team. I just hope we can put all this trade talk nonsense behind us and you can go out there next season and do your thing. I look forward to seeing you weave in and out of traffic ever so fluidly when you rush end to end; I can't wait to see you put the puck on a tee for whichever defenceman is fortunate enough to be paired with you; and I'm dying to see you go 4 for 4 again in next year's shooting accuracy competition. Simply put, nobody does it better.

Wednesday, July 29, 2009

LA LAWYER ARRESTED AFTER KNIFE ASSAULT ON PROCESS SERVER

Barrister Ralph Gibson Pagter Jr. (shown here without the Bowie Knife)

LA Now

A Santa Anna, California partner in the law firm Pagter and Miller has been arrested for allegedly attempting to stab a process server who tried to serve a civil suit on the Bowie Knife wielding barrister at his home.

According to Santa Ana Police Sgt. Mark Kozakowski, when the process server tried to serve the papers Ralph Gibson Pagter Jr., 49, confronted the man, threatened him, then tried to stab him.

According to police, Pagter’s weapon of choice to fend off process servers is described as a large hunting knife, the Los Angeles Times blog LA Now reported.

The process server fled unharmed and called police, who arrived at the home and arrested Pagter on suspicion of assault with a deadly weapon, police told the Times. He was booked at the Orange County Jail and released today on $25,000 bail.

Pagter, who specializes in bankruptcy law, has been a California attorney since 1984.

What, if anything, caused Pagter to flip out and allegedly assault the process server is not known.

Perhaps Pagter thought that the man was a would be burglar...trying to serve him with papers?

Since the process server was unarmed and outside Pagter’s home self defense would seem like a tough sell-but the case will be filed in Southern California……

We have covered lawyers arrested and/or convicted for all manner of misbehavior—including slavery, bribery, theft, forgery, embezzlement, manufacturing methamphetamine, mail fraud, being naked in the office, shoplifting, fighting, child molestation, and rape—but this is our first report of an alleged lawyer-on-process-server attack with a bowie knife.

Congratulations barrister Pagter—you have made blogging history.

But will the charges "stick"? Stay tuned.



Tuesday, July 28, 2009

The Best Burritos #1: Burrito Boyz


Blogto ranks Burrito Boyz #1 when it comes to the best burrito in Toronto. This also marks my first #1 review in my short blogging life. Now I work five minutes away from this place but never went before. After bringing it up in the PPP CC (come join in the fun if you're not already there) Furcifer and Blindfolded Tank Driver convinced me to check it out. Needless to say, my expectations going in were high. Let's see if they lived up to the hype.

Location: 2.5/5

Burrito Boyz is located at 218 Adelaide St. W which is right off Simcoe. It's downtown Toronto so the location isn't terrible but it's sort of hidden. I don't recall any big flashy signs or anything but it is right under Smoke's Poutinerie. You can't miss it because the line up will be past the door!

This brings us to the score. Now any establishment situated within walking distance of a subway station will usually be at least a 4. The reason why I scored Burrito Boyz low is due to the set up (or lack of) in the restaurant. I went around 1:00 PM which is a bit later than the standard lunch time yet the line was huge. The restaurant itself isn't too big so the line literally went to the door, which is also where the garbage is conveniently placed so people would cut into the line to throw away their trash. After about ten minutes, I finally got to the cashier and ordered my large steak burrito with a Coke. I was given a number and was told to wait on the right.

Well, the right is pretty much a mosh pit. It's a standing area with no lines and you just wait for your number to be called. It took about another 20 minutes for them to call my number. I don't know if line ups would help cut down the waiting time but it would certainly be more orderly. Once they do call your number, you would then give them your receipt, order what you want on your burrito and go back to the mosh pit to wait for them to make it. This roughly took another 10 minutes so in total, it took us 40 minutes to just get our food! Only after did we find out we could order in to pick it up. Fuck.

Taste: 5/5

The line up might have been long but fuck, it was totally worth it. I was in burrito heaven. I got a large steak burrito (you can choose from vegetarian, halibut, shrimp, chicken and steak) with a whole wheat tortillia with everything in it. Now what's everything, you ask? I'll gladly tell. Everything includes a mild salsa, guacomole, jalapeno peppers, green peppers, tomatoes, lettuce, green onion, shredded cheese, Mexican style rice and refried pinto beans. On top of that, there are three sauces: their special burrito sauce, sour cream and a hot sauce. Once all that is wrapped up with the steak, they grill the burrito on both sides.

Now this isn't the first time I've had a burrito from a burrito joint so I figured I knew what to expect upon ordering it. My problem with burritos I've had in the past is that the cilantro is often overpowering. This isn't a problem with the steak burrito I just ordered though! My mouth just had an orgasm. The guacamole is fresh, the rice ratio is perfect, the cheese is melted and the steak is seasoned to perfection. The only problem with my burrito is that it was fuckin spicier than all the curry in India. Now I can usually handle my spice so I'm surprised that eating this was making me sweat bullets. I've downed suicide wings without even thinking twice before (of course I was drunk as shit and probably ignored the burning sensation) so what's up with the pussification of my tongue all of a sudden? I did manage to finish it but it was a struggle.

Value: 4/5

A large burrito with a coke was roughly $8.50 or so. While that might seem expensive at first glance, this thing was massive. It must have weighed over a pound and can easily be doubled for a weapon in case a hungry homeless guy tries to mug you. Though it's not the cheapest thing you can get downtown, it's very fulfilling in both quality and quantity!

Verdict: 4.5 Luchadores out of 5

Burrito Boyz is some good eatin! They also make quesadillas there, but I'm just going to stick with the burritos. The only thing stopping this from a perfect 5 would be the wait times but since I know that they do pick ups now, I'll be sure to call in to avoid spending my whole lunch hour waiting for my meal. While my first taste seemed extra spicy, I'm almost positive it wasn't meant to set my tongue on fire. There really is only one way to find out and that's to make another trip back. I'll gladly do that...after I call in to place my order.

Monday, July 27, 2009

PHILLIP SPECTOR APPEAL UPDATE: RECORD ON APPEAL FILED

On July 27, 2009, the Los Angeles County Superior Court Clerk and Court Reporter filed the official trial court record on appeal—triggering a due date of September 9, 2009 for the music producer’s appellate counsel to file his opening brief on appeal.

The case has been assigned to Division Three of the Second Appellate District; meaning that three of the following judges will most likely hear the appeal:

Presiding Justice Joan D. Klein
Associate Justice H. Walter Croskey
Associate Justice Patti S. Kitching
Associate Justice Richard D. Aldrich

The three judges to whom the case has been assigned is not publicly known at this time.

More later.

MICHAEL VIC REINSTATED INTO THE NFL

The NFL has conditionally reinstated Michael Vick.

Vick will not be eligible to play until Week 6 during the regular season and can play in the final two preseason games. His eligibility to play in Week 6 will be based on him following the NFL's guidelines that will oversee his off-field life, including his finances and personal relationships.

For those of you who have been living in the wilderness and do not understand this post, please see our prior post: Michael Vic Gets 23 Months in Prison for Federal Dog Fighting Case.


Sunday, July 26, 2009

The Best Chicken Wings #5: All Star Wings & Ribs

L-R: Wings Gone Wild - My Ranch is on Fire

Another one for the best of series. This time I'm doing wings. Coming in at #5 on the blogto list of best Wings in Toronto is All Star Wings & Ribs. I didn't know the
"& Ribs" were a part of their name since I don't know anybody who has ever had their ribs before but I digress...

Location: 2/5

I believe there are two locations, neither of them are in Toronto. The one I went to is the one in Markham (the only other one I'm aware of is in Richmond Hill). It is located in a plaza at the corner of 16th Ave and Woodbine. Needless to say, you can't get here by TTC. You can probably take the YRT (York Region Transit) or VIVA but since you would probably have to camp out for a bus, I wouldn't bother making the trip unless you have a car. If you do have a car though, their wings are definitely worth the drive.

Taste: Could be anywhere from a 1/5 to a 5/5

Don't get me wrong, All Star has fabulous wings. They're lightly breaded, covered in sauce yet remaining crunchy and very flavourful. The problem is that they have over 150,000 flavours to choose from. That may be an exagerration but they easily have over 100 flavours, most of which have a vague names like American Eruption, Tsunami, Pucker Up Baby and Killer Bee. This wouldn't be a problem if there were little descriptions about each flavour but there isn't. It's just one long list categorized by how spicy they are (their classification system goes from Pacifiers to Baseballs to Flaming Stars to Fire Alarms to Mushroom Clouds and finally to a Radioactive Material Logo). Sure, you could stop a waitress and ask them but this place gets PACKED on Friday and Saturday nights so the waitresses seem rude and rushed. With the help of some friends though, I have compiled a list of some of the flavours we have tried and a little description of it to help you out.

Aaron: Snakebite - A bit tangy and not too spicy (Categorized under 3 Flaming Stars on the menu)

My Ranch is on Fire - Too much ranch. It was disgusting and it made me throw up (Yes Aaron, we're sure it was the wings and not the alcohol lol but I'll take your word for it. 4 Flaming Stars)

Aileen (Note: Aileen and Aaron are fraternal twins): My Ranch is on Fire - Her favourite flavour. Creamy ranch with a little tangy hot sauce with freshly ground black pepper. (I haven't seen a set of twins go in such opposite directions since Victoria Beckham got her boob job. Bada-Bing)

Sweet Tooth Rancher - Creamy and sweet but thick in the mouth (That's what she said. 1 Pacifier)

Nero's Epilogue - Like my ranch is on fire but instead of black pepper, they top it with parmesan cheese. (4 Flaming Stars)

Cheesy Where's The Beef? = Poutine - Fries + Wings. That's basically what it is but instead of using cheese curds, they use shredded cheddar (1 Pacifier)

Christine: Honey Garlic - Standard honey garlic (1 Pacifier)

Honey BBQ - Didn't like it. It was too sweet and there wasn't enough barbeque taste (1 Pacifier)

Shirley: Wings Gone Wild - This flavour is the BEST. Not spicy has a honey mustard taste.

Teresa: Sicillian - Breaded, dry and slightly spicy. (No rating because it's on the dry style side of the menu)

Victoria: Hot Hawaiian Honey - Tangy, Sweet and Hot (3 Flaming Stars)

Myself: Fourplay - This is disgusting. It was spicy and it is a blend of four different sauces (I have no idea which four) The sauces might be great alone but they come together to form the taste of ass (4 Flaming Stars)

Wings Gone Wild - My favourite flavour. It definitely has a honey mustard taste to it. A bit sweet. A bit of kick would make it even better (3 Flaming Stars)

Nero's Epilogue - I didn't think this tasted like My Ranch is on Fire. It wasn't all that flavourful. It was topped with parmesan though. (4 Flaming Stars)

There are still over 100 flavours left to be tried but I'm simply not adventurous to go for them after experiencing the disaster known as Fourplay. If you have tried any flavours that we missed out on, I would love to hear from you. Leave a comment with your review!

Value: 3/5

Okay so wings are expensive anywhere you go (I don't know why, it's just chicken wings and sauce) so I doubt we will ever see a 5/5 on value. I got a double order (20 wings) and a coke and it was around $20-22 after tax and tip. I guess it could be worse but that's at least a dollar a wing...

Verdict: 3.5 Peters in your Mouth out of 5

Peters, Buffalo, Wings, get it? Nevermind...

The location is a bit lousy and the price definitely isn't for the budget-minded but the awesome wings (once you find your flavour) certainly makes up for it. However, I find that they're outdoing themselves by listing so many flavours on their menu without a description. While some flavours are certainly worth its weight in gold, the fact that picking a new flavour is such a crapshoot kind of sucks. Who doesn't want to try a Kama Sutra or a Pandora's Box?

Downs Syndrome

Doc in the Bullpen

This week simply hasn't been great for Scott Downs but before I get into that, I guess I'll have to talk about Friday's game.

The rain was out but we didn't care, we were on a mission to see Doc and a little precipitation wasn't going to stop us. After a hot dog and a little pre-drinking, we were ready to enter the dome to see our hero take the mound (at least) one last time.

We got to our seats a half hour early and the good Doctor came out (to a small ovation) to stretch. Arnsberg and Barajas made their way from the clubhouse to the bullpen to catch Doc. Arnsberg was drinking a Red Bull.

I decided to sneak to the seats down by the bullpen to watch Halladay in action, up close and personal. Now I've been to live ball games plenty of times before but watching a pitcher from a distance, you really don't get a feel for the velocity in the pitches. Doc's fastball is in the low 90's and man that was quick. His breaking stuff kept catching the outside corner too. I would hate to have to stand in the box and try to get a hit off him. I managed a couple of pictures (sorry for the crappy quality. I should really invest in a camera) and got a few decent videos of his bull pen session.

As I was making my way back to my seat the anthem started playing. Now I never understood the reason for the anthem at sporting events but whether you like it or not, it's there. Which also means, give it some respect aka shut the fuck up and take off your fuckin hat. As I stood at the top of the stairs, I could see three or four hats on people's heads in that one section alone. I'm 24 years-old so I'm hardly from Don Cherry's era nor am I like your crazy Uncle who starts every third sentence with "Back when I was in 'Nam..." but I am a proud Canadian and that just made me sick.

As the game got on it's way I noticed that the crowd was a little small considering the circumstances. I was expecting a much larger turn-out like 35,000 or so but the attendance was at a little more than 24,000. Pretty lame, Toronto. Luckily for us, we sat behind a loud and obnoxious (and probably the only) Marlins fan. He kept ragging on how his team has won three World Series since '93 (umm...buddy, if you were such a die-hard fan, you would know that the Marlins only have two championhips). I got to give him credit though; I'm shocked he was even aware of the Marlins' existance considering he looked like he was still living in 1988. He wore black acid washed jeans, a Marlins jersey (probably with a Poison or Guns 'n' Roses t-shirt underneath), a black bandana with hair that would have made Kenny G jealous.

Doc was a little uncharacteristic early on, giving up a hit and issuing a walk in the first but he managed to get out of that mini jam unscathed. He wasn't as lucky in the third. After giving up another walk to Bartlett, Bossman Jr. pushed the runner to third on a double with no outs. Both runners ended up coming home but only one earned against Doc as Upton got to third on a pass ball on Barajas. The Jays ended up getting those runs back in the bottom of the inning on a Scutaro single and a Hill double. Once the score was tied at 2-2, Doc settled down and was pretty much vintage Doc from that point onward. Well, until the 9th anyway. In the 9th, he gave up another walk (third of the night) and then a single to push runners on the corners with two outs. It's okay, this is Doc we're talking about. He ended up getting the next guy to ground out to end the inning.

As Halladay was making his way to the dug out, the crowd was up on their feet giving him a standing ovation. Not only for the great game he pitched today but also for the past 11 seasons. Doc was all business as usual. There wasn't a tip of the cap, but that's okay, we understood; the score was tied, there was still work to be done. Once Doc got to the bench Cito trotted over and shook his hand. After a brilliant 9-inning, 116 pitch effort, the book on the Doctor was closed. His line was definitely impressive (9 IP, 1 ER, 4 H, 3 BB, 10 K). C'mon Jays, let's get a run in buttom of the 9th to give Doc the win, walk-off style.

Hill started it off. Garza threw a slider down and away. Ball 1. Next pitch was a fastball down the middle that blew right past Hill. One and one. Next was a hanging breaking ball...and with one crack of the bat, Hill deposited that off Windows restaurant. That was it! Jays win! Everybody came pouring out of the dug o...I felt a nudge from my buddy. I woke up just in time to see Rolen go down swinging. Garza just struck out the side and we're headed to extras. Fuck. The 10th is just something I don't really want to get into. To sum it up: Scott Downs had two on and two outs but gave up two runs too many. Jays lose 4-2.

I'm sorry, we couldn't get you your league-leading 12th win, Roy but thanks for the memories.

On to yesterday's game. I don't have much to say on it since I didn't see the whole thing. I was watching it during lunch and left the restaurant before the 5th inning. But hey, Aaron Hill looked more like Hank Aaron and the Jays were up 8-0. What me worry? I had better things to do than watch a blow out; like pick up a suit for a wedding. So off I went. An hour later, I get a text message from my friend that read "Jays blew a 9-1 lead. Game is going to extras" WHAT. THE. FUCK?!

Scott Downs comes in in the 12th to blow the game again...

I really hope BJ Ryan syndrome isn't contageous

I really don't know what's up with Scott Downs but he just hasn't been the same after his toe injury. In the last week, he's had an abysmal ERA of 15.00 and a WHIP of 3.33 (no wonder my fantasy team's ERA is over 7 and WHIP is over 1.50). I know filming 500 Days of Summer must have been fun but please remember that you're still a major league closer. Perhaps The Blue Jay Hunter was right, maybe Cito should have sat Downs yesterday and put in Frasor. The Blissfully Oblivious Bench Boss with another questionable decision in a year which many were made (not moving Vernon and Rios down earlier in the season, keeping Millar vs lefties, not hitting Overbay higher when he was hot, etc). Regardless, the way the Jays' luck have been, we would have eventually gone to Downs and he would have lost the game in the 15th instead of the 12th. I'm with eyebleaf though. I still believe in Scott Downs!

Driscollites

I've noticed a growing trend of excitable Driscoll followers swelling the ranks of conservative evangelicals over the past few months. These are usually young men, and their submissive girlfriends, who religiously get Driscoll's podcast, quote him regularly and will vigorously defend the doctrines of predestination and ecclesiastical male headship when needed. They're the neo-Calvinists, they listen to John Piper too but their main man is Driscoll. They're the Driscollites.

I think I particularly noticed it on this camp. We had a "Big Questions" night that I was running. I decided to run it as a discussion among the campers facilitated by me, rather than just me answering all the questions. For the first time ever in one of these discussions I had a sizable chunk of people vigorously discussing predestination with all the best informed people arguing for total depravity and unconditional election. Usually it's just me explaining predestination to a bunch of teenagers who are saying things like "my brain hurts".

When the issue of women in ministry came up the only argument made with any cohesiveness was for not having women in ministry and it was the only view viewpoint defended. Only at the end of the discussion did I point out that the issue was much more divided that had been presented and that there are also strong Biblical arguments for having women in ministry.

People came up to me on camp and asked me if I was an Arminian or a Calvinist.

I'm pretty sure this is all the work of the Driscollites.

Now I'm not saying this is a bad trend. As many of you would know, I'm a regular Driscoll listener myself. I love listening to him. In fact I think he's my favourite preacher to listen to at the moment. I appreciate his clarity, his solid Bibleness, his humour, his willingness to give the hard word and his obsessive focus on Jesus. He is very good at what he does.

However He hasn't instilled in me a rabid love of Calvinism. Nor has he convinced me of his view point for the role of women in the church and family.

I guess I am interested to see this Driscollite thing happening. I think it's great that there are so many young men passionately caring about theology and the faithful teaching of Scripture. I worry a little that Driscoll's opinionated approach to preaching has rubbed off on the Driscollites giving them a keen need to instil in people doctrinal correctness. In my experience of conservative evangelical men they can sometimes get more obsessed with doctrine than Jesus, and evangelism starts with Jesus but ends with Luther. This isn't new, but Driscoll seems to have opened up the obsession to a whole new and broader cross-section.

If I had to hope for anything to come out of this I hope it opens more young men up to a love of Jesus, a love of the Bible and a love of preaching. I hope the Driscollites (of which I may be one) don't just stop at Dricoll but get excited to get the podcasts of all sorts of preachers. To get Louie Giglio's gentleness, Rob Bells lateral Biblical contextualisation and focus on the poor, to get John Stott's calm, understated evangelical passion, John Piper's thoroughness, Paul Washer's anger, T.D. Jake's excitement. And I hope that they discover a bunch of preachers I know nothing about. I'd love to see this Driscoll wave open people up, not narrow them down. So that by the end they've seen Jesus through many different eyes, and love him, worship him and proclaim him more and better because of it.

Weeked

It does occur to me that I haven't really blogged about Camp. But I don't really want to. What I will say though is that it was good and the talks went well. I continued to sweat my way through them. It was only on the last day that I managed to maintain a normal body temperature throughout the exercise.

This camp's celebrity look alike for me was Jerry Seinfeld. I prefer Chris Martin. I think Ryan Gosling has been by favourite though. Ronald McDonald my least favourite.

Friday, July 24, 2009

You Say Goodbye and I Say Hello


Live from my cubicle...just one more hour until I can get out of here. I'll be off to find scalpers to get tickets to see The Doctor do his thing live one last time. That's right, I said it. I've already cut my ties, the bags have been packed, the tears have been shed (okay, not quite yet) and I'm ready to move on. Perhaps I will find a new ace to adore. Hopefully I can find one in my boy Shaun Marcum (so my jersey doesn't add to my growing pile of defunct Toronto jerseys) or the young southpaw, Ricky Romero (RR Cool Jay to those in the know) or even Mr. Rzepczynski (that's right, I memorized it). Whoever it might be, they will never replace the void that Doc is leaving in my heart. Much like how Felix Potvin will always be my favourite Leafs goalie, Halladay will always be my ace.

I wish you the best, Doc. You've deserved it. Come October, I will be rooting for you to take your team deep in the World Series...even if you end up going to the Yankees (but for my sake, please don't). I will watch proudly as you lift the World Series trophy over your head not once, but twice. Perhaps after getting the sweet taste of victory we can be reunited once again. If not, no hard feelings because I know I'll get to see you donning the Blue Jays cap at least one more time; the day you rightfully take your place in Cooperstown.

Sucked In

I returned from camp this arvo and my email inbox is overflowing with emails. Three from someone called Ash. One just said "Hi" and then two that said:

"Whats cookin good lookin..its ASH*LEY! remember me..
we use to chat on F_B til u DELETED ME lol.. well anyways no more BF
so lets hook up.. chat me on here

A`~ I M = DizzyOil3
M ~S -N = IzzyTutzy *a*t L.I.V.E dot -com-"

Now I'm not the kinda guy to go pursuing random women over the internet. (I only pursue random pastors over the internet.) But I did feel a little bad for this girl that she thought we could now get together since she's broken up with her boyfriend. It was clearly a case of mistaken identity, as I've never deleted anyone from my Facebook, and I can't remember chatting to anyone called Ash.

So I wrote back to her explaining the mistaken identity in the hope that she will one day find her true love who has an email address similar to mine.

She wrote back immediately and invited me to chat in her VIP chat room.

Damn it! I hadn't seen it. I wrote back to a spam bot. Foolish. Now I'm going to get double spammed.

It was the fact that she wrote like a teenager that got me. I tend not to ignore teenagers who contact me on the internet and say they know me because generally they do and I've just forgotten them from some camp or other I did.

Oh well. I hope Spambot Ash finds her true love. I don't think I'll go meet her in her VIP chat room.

Wednesday, July 22, 2009

Going for a Check Up

"So don't go away, saying what you say
Say that you'll stay, forever and a day..."


Assuming nothing drastic happens in the next 48 hours, the good Doctor will be on the mound Friday against the Tampa Bay Devil Rays. Let's show Doc the love he so rightfully deserves. We know he loves Toronto but let's make it that much harder for him to waive his no-trade clause if J.P. does find a taker for him...and if he does decide to leave, then let's give him a proper send off. I know I'll be making it down to the Dome this Friday, will you?

LAWYER JAILED FOR 14 YEARS OVER $2.5M HIDDEN FROM EX RELEASED

Is that a knowing twinkle in the Chadster’s eye, or our imagination?

In late 2007 we told you about the unusually stubborn Pennsylvania attorney H. Beatty Chadwick—who refused to reveal to his ex-wife in divorce proceedings where $2.5 million in hidden assets was located—even though he had been jailed until he coughed up the offshore accounts. As of our 2007 post, Chadwick had been in jail for 13 years!

We are please to report that attorney Chadwick has been released! Without coughing up a dime in hidden assets!

Legal humor blog Lowering the Bar reports that Judge Joseph Cronin said he agreed with previous rulings that Chadwick had the ability to comply with the order to pay but had "willfully refused to do so."

Explains Lowering the Bar:

“He released Chadwick, though, because he found that continued imprisonment would be legal only if there was some likelihood that ultimately he would comply with the order; otherwise, the confinement would be merely punitive instead of coercive. Apparently 14 years of incarcerated non-compliance - believed to be the longest sentence served for contempt of court in U.S. history - is enough to support a finding that future compliance is unlikely.”

One wonders, though, if it was not equally obvious that the Chadster would never tell after the first two, three or four years in the slammer.

The Chadster, who is now 73 years old, is not quite sure what to do with the rest of his life—now that his freedom has been restored.

May we respectfully suggest spending some of that $2.5 million + accumulated interest on suitable accommodations on some Caribbean island accompanied by a much younger and insanely beautiful woman?

We could make that suggestion, but it would be wrong.

Vaya con Dios Chadster.

Lawyer Jailed 13 Years Still Refuses to Tell Ex-Wife Where Assets Are

Lawyer Jailed for Contempt Is Freed After 14 Years

Monday, July 20, 2009

Camp

I'm on camp at the moment.

Actually I'm not, I'm at home. But I was on Camp till two hours ago. I'm the Senior High speaker and we're talking about Jonah.

Unfortunately I arrived at camp on Saturday and had a little bit of cough. Yesterday morning I felt pretty terrible and asked to be excused from the Leader training. Fever, cough, that sort of thing. In the afternoon I sat in at the back of the Camp Welcome for all the campers and the Director saw me and afterwards he asked me to stay in my room. So I got quarantined. I think he's worried it's swine flu.

I pretty much spent all yesterday and all today in my tiny little room, with just a bed, a desk, a phone that rings some times (but I don't answer it), and a bookshelf with old Christian books on it. It felt like a cross between prison and hospital, but it's probably better than both.

The lack of stimulation didn't really bother me. I had my book but I spent most of my time sleeping.

I did my first talk today. I got out of bed, did my talk, and went back to bed. I'm not sure if it was any good. I remember sweating a lot.

I'm going to spend tonight at home and I'll go back tomorrow for talk two. I shouldn't be too bad tomorrow. I'm feeling much improved this afternoon. I even made it to Centrelink to squeeze some more money out of Rudd. I'm looking forward to being employed.

Sunday, July 19, 2009

The Best Poutine #2: The Blue Chip Truck


Another blog entry for the foodies out there. This is the first entry in the "Best Poutine in Toronto" List. There are twelve in total on blogto. Hopefully I can get through them without having to go for triple bypass surgery. Well, coming in at #2, we have the famous Blue Truck outside Nathan Phillips Square.

Location: 4.5/5

You will find the blue chip truck stationed outside Nathan Phillips Square which is right by Queen and Bay. It's only a couple of minutes from the Queen street end of the Eaton Centre so you won't have trouble getting there by TTC. I didn't give it a 5 out of 5 because there are TWO blue trucks to buy food from! You will know you went to the right one if you see a scrolling display on the top of the truck. The correct one also says Slush-Pop-Water on the front of it. I believe the other one is called Mr. Tasty. Since you're buying food from a truck, it's pretty much to go. You should be able to find seats on the benches outside Nathan Phillips Square (if they're not occupied by sleeping homeless people) but on nice days, it's tough to get a seat in the shade as it just gets too crowded. You may have to eat standing up or sitting on the hot edge of the wading pool. Entertainment won't be a problem though. You're guaranteed to catch a lot of cleavage and skimpy skirts in the summer time and if you're lucky you will catch a total act of randomness. When I was there, I saw two protests going on. One involving the City of Toronto workers and another involving student workers telling CUPE to work things out and get back to work. I also saw a homeless guy running across the wading pool as he was getting chased by security guards. Good times!

Taste: 5/5

Let's face it, one of the many benefits of being Canadian is the ability to get a poutine at almost any hour. Having tried poutines from many different outlets, my critique on poutines have become pretty strict. Even then, blue chip truck simply blows many of them out of the water. Let's break down these three simple ingredients.

Fries - The fries from the blue chip truck as freshly cut and always hot. They don't serve their fries from under a heat lamp; they come straight out of the hot oil and are salted nicely. Their fries have some size so they won't get all soggy and limp when covered in gravy. They are already excellent alone but even better with cheese and gravy!

Gravy - Now the last time I had a poutine prior to this was at Smoke's Poutinerie. My main complaint about their gravy was that it was too bland! Well, this isn't a problem at the blue truck. The gravy is packed with flavour and they really load it onto your fries. And as I said earlier, the gravy has a nice thick texture so you're not left with a soup when you get to the bottom.

Cheese Curds - This is usually the deal breaker for me; this is what separates a good poutine from a bad one. I can't believe some places don't even use cheese curds in their poutine (automatic fail!) rather, they use shredded cheese. Well, the blue truck uses fresh chunks of cheese curds! They're slightly salty and squeek between your teeth when you chew them. They give you a decent amount too.

Value: 3.5/5

A medium poutine and a can of coke was $6.25 ($5 for the poutine, $1.25 for the coke). I wouldn't exactly call that a great deal but it is filling and any time you can get lunch for under $7 in downtown Toronto should be considered a good price.

Verdict: 5 Flailing Habs out of 5

Now when you think of getting good food, very rarely do you picture getting it out of a truck, however the poutine from the blue chip truck has got to be one of the best I've had. It just shows that there's nothing wrong with simplicity.

Thursday, July 16, 2009

Request Ignored

I'm seriously thinking about deleting Facebook. Anyone have any objections?

Wednesday, July 15, 2009

Wizard People Dear Readers



In honour of HP6.

WOMAN BECOMES LAWYER TO FREE BROTHER, THEN WINS HIM $3.4 MILLION


Kenneth Waters served 18 years in prison for a murder he did not commit. His sister, Betty Ann Waters (right), earned a law degree and then obtained his release + $3.4 M in damages

This lady has our admiration. Her brother was wrongfully convicted and sent to prison. Convinced of her brother’s innocence, she decides to go to law school, graduates, passes the bar exam, then wins her brother’s freedom (based on DNA testing), then wins her brother a $3.4 million settlement for his wrongful conviction and incarceration. (Unfortinately, her brother died 6 months after his sister obtained his release, and did not live long enough to see his multi-million dollar award. )

Wow! What a story. What a lady! They should make a movie about it. Wait, they did….staring Hilary Swank.

Read More

Hat Tip: ABA Journal, Lawyer Vindicated After Long Fight for Wrongfully Convicted Brother

Tuesday, July 14, 2009

Joy

I love pulling hairs out of my nose. It's really satisfying.

Brown Man

I was at the station today and over the loud speaker I think I heard the man say "Would the brown man in the white sneakers please stand behind the yellow line". Then one Indian turned to another Indian (wearing white sneakers and standing over the yellow line) and said "That's you man. He wants you to move."

I don't know if I heard right, but if I did, it was odd.

Friday, July 10, 2009

Sydney

I'm back.

It's nice to be home. The jet lag seems to be pretty well taken care of, which is nice. The flight home was pretty easy. I was in a seat near the back of the plane with one empty seat next to me when I arrived. Then I looked up and there was a hot American girl who was sitting next to me. Suddenly the pressure of all those daydreams where you find yourself sitting next to a hot girl who also turns out to be the love of your life came tumbling down on me. I started to stress about if I should be pulling out all my suave plane traveller moves. But I needn't have worried because the girl sat down, put on headphones, eye mask, and went to sleep. She didn't take off her headphones the whole trip. Even after she woke up, and when we were diverted to Brisbane to refuel, she was stubbornly listening to Qantas radio. So there was no opportunity to dazzle her. I suspect she may have kept the headphones on as she saw the anxiety on my face when I saw her and realised I might have just stumbled into a romantic comedy. She wanted to make sure there was no romance and no comedy to be had in row 72 of that flight.

Since being in Sydney, I've just mooched around. Watched (and slept through) some DVDs, visited the parents, been barred by Oscar. I did see Helen and Jon and Helen, Mike and Hannah in Westfield yesterday when I was buying my fruity bodywash. That was serendipitous seeing as 4 out of the 6 of us had, until very recently been on other sides of the globe.

Today I'm working. I managed to turn up for work 2 hours early so I got a hair cut. The hair dresser made me look a little trendy, which caused me a fair bit of distress till I rectified it in the toilets.

And that is life back in the greatest city in the entire universe (except maybe Wellington)!

CHILD MOLESTING LAWYER FROM NYC MEGA-FIRM CRAVATH NOW SUING CITY FOR SEX-OFFENDER REPORTING REQUIREMENTS

PoughkeepsieJournal.com

Not excruciating enough (for lawyers) that a former lawyer with (arguably) the most prestigious law firm in the United Stares was not only arrested for a paying a mother for sex with her children, was then fired, and then sued Cravath, dirt bag former tax lawyer James Colliton is once again in the news, once again for filing a lawsuit blaming others for his fall from grace/resulting quality of life.

As we previously reported, On October 2, 2007, Colliton pleaded guilty to second- and third-degree statutory rape and patronizing a prostitute. The married former tax lawyer, who also had five children of his own, was charged in connection with his payment to a woman so he could have sex with her two children.

Colliton, it was alleged, repeatedly had sex the children, ages 13 and 15, after paying their mother for permission.

Colliton, arrested and fired by his law firm in 2006, was sentenced in October, 2007 to the 19 months he had already served in jail awaiting trial and declared a sex offender. (See our prior post here .)

Then, as also reported here, Colliton sued his former employer Cravath, Swaine & Moore for salary, vacation pay and even annual bonus payments to which he claimed to be entitled.

Free after (incredibly) being sentenced to time served after paying a mother to have sex with her children, Colliton claims he has been harassed by town police officers who regularly visit his physical residence, which Colliton listed as a Route 9 motel. The visits are part of a sex offender monitoring program initiated several years ago by county District Attorney William Grady.

Colliton claims the program violates state law and deprives him of his constitutional right to privacy and his Fourth Amendment right against unlawful searches.

Describing police visits as the "intentional infliction of emotional distress," Colliton recently served town and county officials with a notice of claim - often a precursor to filing suit.

In his eight-page claim filed last month, Colliton indicates he intends to seek $3 million in compensatory damages and $97 million in punitive damages in federal court.


"I have suffered liberty and property deprivations," Colliton wrote in his notice, which he apparently authored. He said police "visits came and keep coming even though no court has adjudged they are lawful."

Wednesday, July 8, 2009

The Times, They Are A-Changin'

Typical sight at the ACC come the 2009-10 season

The number seven is a strange number. There are seven days in a week; seven wonders of the world, seven deadly sins; why is nine scared of seven? Because seven, eight, nine (rimshot) Seven days is also the number of days it took Brian Burke to alter the identity of the Leafs from the 08-09 cottenelle soft edition to the 09-10 "pugnacious, testosteroneous, truculent, belligerent" edition. Over those seven days Burke signed two of the more sought after free agent defencemen in Komisarek and Beauchemin and traded for a sandpaper warrior in Exelby (though I'm still not a big fan of the deal) giving us a three-headed monster on D. On top of that, he signed a human meat tenderizer in Colton Orr! Sure, we won't get a ton of goals from those guys but let's not forget we scored 250 goals last year without a big name threat (which ties us for sixth in the Eastern conference) while our goals against was dead last in the entire NHL. I'm sure that number will improve drastically with our newly acquired three-headed monster.

Speaking of monsters...


The Monster seen trampling through Montreal before arriving in Toronto

After going 0 for 2 when it came to signing highly coveted Swedes, we were finally due ours! The Monster was landed on the seventh day and he comes with sparkling numbers from across the Atlantic (1.96 GAA and .932 Save % in the regular season and even more impressive numbers in the playoffs). Yes, I know that the NHL is a different game, but the Swedish Elite League is nothing to scoff at. I gotta say, I've never been so excited about an acquisition of a player I've never seen play!

With the new and improved defence corps, I don't see too many teams willing to venture out past centre ice, and with the Monster in net, we won't have to worry about them beating Toskala's glove hand from the red line.

The times are definitely a-changin'. We might not be there yet, but we're headed in the right direction. I can sense it...no, I can feel it! and I know you can too. So take a breath and say with with me....PLAYOFFS!!!1

Unfortunately, this whole week had it's downs too. On to a topic I didn't think I would have to talk about. Not this year, anyway.

First and foremost, I love Roy Halladay. I don't know if I've ever adored an athlete on a Toronto team as much as him (and I'm a total homer). The Leafs are my favourite team of all time but I love the franchise as a whole. Individually? It's gotta be Doc.

Doc is the greatest professional, the most professional of all professionals if you must. His intensity is unmatched and totally genuine yet he's humble and a total class act. His journey as a straight flamethrowing prospect to his class A demotion really makes cheering for him sort of like cheering for the underdog despite knowing that there's a chance you will see him throw a no hitter that night. Not even the most vile of fans (read: Massholes) have the heart to boo this guy because he simply doesn't have any dirt on him for them to get on.

Unfortunately, as much as we didn't want it to happen, we all knew this day would come. The day the talks of trading Doc would fill the papers, the day we would have to sit here and read foolish trade proposals on rival sites, the day American outlets will start salivating at the thought of the best pitcher in baseball playing for an American team. Shit, when was the last time you saw this much Blue Jays coverage in the American media? Despite all that, I'm still calling it what it is...the sensationalization of a non-story! If Gretzky could get traded, anybody could but that doesn't mean they're being shopped. It just means that if a team really wants this guy and overpays grandly, then they can have him. There is only one scenario where I can even think of actively shopping Doc; if there's no chance the Jays can sign him to an extension. Truth is, Doc would love to stay with the team that drafted him and never gave up on him. He's just loyal like that. But if Rogers won't open up the wallet, there's no way he's staying. No, I'm not taking Richard Griffin's suggestion in that we restructure his contract just so that he earns a million more than Burnett. I'm proposing that Rogers pony up the cash and grab some talent and show Doc that they're focused on winning. We all know that Doc isn't about the money. I mean, what can you do with $20M that you can't do with $16M?

While I'm confident Doc will remain a Jay for the rest of the year, I'm already dreading this discussion next year because come next year the columns are no longer meaningless. As much as I would like Rogers to spend the cash, I just don't see it happening. They will fall back on the lame recession excuse to try and justify it (while raising our cable and phone bills), thank Doc for his dozen years of service and just ship him off. As a Blue Jays fan, it's a story that I have read too many times. 2011 will be a dreadful season to watch without the Doctor leading the charge...

Prove me wrong, Rogers...prove me wrong...