This Week In Hockey: Opening Week

Hockey's back! It's been back for a good week now. There's definitely been a few surprises. Some pleasant (LEAFS!!!1) and some just downright hilarious. In case you're still catching up with your hockey news, don't fret. I got ya.

Oct 7 - Opening Night

• Leafs beat the Habs. Leafs fans everywhere breathes a sigh of relief as they won't go winless in their first eight games this season.
• Jordan Eberle scores his first goal and it's a beauty.

Oct 8

• Ondrej Pavelec collapses on the ice for no apparent reason. Doctors are still running tests to determine what was wrong. Isn't it obvious? Dude's playing in his fourth season in Atlanta...

Oct 9

• Leafs beat up on the Sens. Toronto media jokes about Leafs fans planning the parade. Where do they come up with such original material?
• John Tavares gets blindsided and is out with a concussion. That loud thud you hear isn't the sound of Tavares hitting the ice, it's the sound of Islanders' fans hopes and dreams being shattered.
• Derek Stepan scores a hat trick in his first NHL game. I have the feeling that this might be the highlight of his career.
• Brodeur puts up a Toskalian effort and gets chased from the net, allowing 5 goals on 20 shots.

Oct 10

• Tyler Seguin scores his first goal after a great over the shoulder catch. Toronto will certainly regret trading that pick. The Argos could definitely use a receiver with those hands.

Oct 11

• James Wisniewski shows Sean Avery how he brushes his back molars. The league suspends him two games for his insensitive actions. C'mon James, total low blow! Hockey players don't have teeth.
• Niklas Hjalmarsson lays out Jason Pominville on a very borderline hit. The biggest crime is that Hjalmarsson's name has a H and a J consecutively. That shouldn't be allowed in any language!
• The New Jersey Devils are victims of salary cap mismanagement once again. They send out 15 skaters due to injuries and suspensions. Luckily it was a home game so nobody was there to witness it.

Oct 12

• Kirk Maltby retires. I didn't realize he was still playing after the lock out. His combined -34 since then might have something to do with that.

Oct 13

• 3 and 0, baby! We're sitting on top and enjoying the view.
• Patrick Kaleta is a bit of a douchenozzle but that's really nothing new.
• Maxim Lapierre hits Steve Downie from behind into the boards. It's hard to believe that it's only been three games into the season because Lapierre's cheapshots are already in mid-season form.

Oct 14

• Mike Modano returns to Dallas and is greeted by a standing ovation. Simon Gagne returns to Philadelphia and is greeted by being pelted with dead batteries.